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The world's longest hot dog.Ode to a hot dog

Whence the hot dog? Contrary to semi-mildly popular belief and in accords with overwhelmingly popular desire hot dogs do not ( generally ) ( hopefully ) contain dogs. This simple fact could be debated until the cows come home, however, because the truth is, no one really, truly, actually knows what comprises the pinkish red, fleshy innards of the glorious sign of American jingoism that is the hot dog.

deep into the unknown

deep into the unknown

     The hot dog has become a symbol of America's unconquerable prosperity. It is the ultimate American food in a time when French fries have been defamed as on the edge of treason and French toast has become an unthikable, unspeakable obscenity. The ball park frank, in its succint simplicity has become The staple at football games, dodgeball games, hockey games, hockey games, cricket games, monopoly games, and even outdoor symphony orchestral performances.

     Whereas Oreos may be milk's best friends, the hot dog has many best friends. Whether you are loyal to the exquisite invention that is mashed tomatoes and corn syrup ( ketchup, to you non-ingredient-label-readers ) or to mustard yellow mustard, the impossible range of options for coating your dog makes one's hippocampus scream in both delight and obfuscated agony. You can put pickle relish on your dog or pickles themselves. You can even, depending on whether you would describe yourself as adventuro or timido, stretch beyond the bounds and experiment with mayonnaise and maple syrup - hopefully you have the wit to not test them concurrently because it is more than likely that any hot dog you put in your mouth will probably not stay inside of your body for more than a few minutes. The option, however, is there, and thus exemplifies the pulchritude held within the hot dog's immense flexibility and adaptability.

     One more major characteristic of the hot dog is its veritable ease and variety of preparation. It can be boiled. It can be broiled - preferably on a stick over a humongous camp fire. One does have to be relatively careful in this situation though, because, as is widely known, it is all fun and games until someone loses a weiner. Annnnd, of course there is always - well maybe not always- the option of grilling the hot dog. In a phenomenon that has swept across the vast American tundra, people have taken a fancy to so called barbequeing. People join together for an outdoor picnic, generally in celebration of the laudable hot dog. We may never know what comprises the tasty innards of the glorious hot dog, but that just adds to its wonder and aura of entitlement. The hot dog will always hold a placein my heart, as it will in almost every American - even if it is in the form of arterial cholesterol blockage. Thanks, hot dog for all of the enrichment you have heaped into my life. It will never be forgotten.

Hot dawg!

Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water (Music)

Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water (Music)
Japanese only SHM-CD (Super High Material CD - playable on all CD players) pressing. Universal. 2008.
Average Customer Rating: 3.0 out of 5 (See the reviews)
List Price: $13.98
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A Hot Dog Program (Video)

A Hot Dog Program (Video)
This fun documentary called A Hot Dog Program looks at one of America’s favorite foods and shows some places around the country where you can get wonderful wieners. From Coney Isl...more
Average Customer Rating: 4.5 out of 5 (See the reviews)
List Price: $19.95
Lowest Used Price: $1.76 (as of 1/7/2009@12:12 AM)
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Family Dog: Hot Dog at the Zoo + Eye on the Sparrow (Video)

Family Dog: Hot Dog at the Zoo + Eye on the Sparrow (Video)

Average Customer Rating: 5.0 out of 5 (See the reviews)
List Price: $12.98
Lowest Used Price: $59.75 (as of 1/7/2009@12:12 AM)

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sircastick89 said:

Not very good.

July 24, 2008 3:07 PM